Hi Aaron,

The Church would have to look at any previous marriages that either of you had to determine if any of them were valid marriages. The reason behind this is that the Church cannot bless bigamy. (Matthew 19:3-6)

If neither of you have been previously married or none of your previous marriages were valid, once you are baptized, your spouse would just have to agree to your raising the children of your marriage Catholic.

She doesn't have to become Catholic unless she wants to. The only obligation she would have is to witness your promise to bring the kids up Catholic.

Any nuances to your specific situation can be clarified by your local Catholic pastor. If you can be validly married in the Church, there is no problem with you being able to receive Holy Communion.

If there is anything we can do to support your journey just ask us.

Mike

Hi, Aaron —

I empathize with your situation. Many times I've been in similar situations I have used the PPP program.

Patience, Perseverance and Prayer.

• Patience to bear the crosses that come your way.
• Perseverance knowing that the Lord never puts us through a trail without the grace to withstand that trail, and
• Prayer to be a silent witness and Christian example for your family members and your room mate.

My personal opinion: The reason your family and your room mate are hindering your progress,
is because you are effecting them by your witness. Of course, they would never tell you this,
but many times, it's a silent, slow, and steady Catholic Christian witness that will win people over.

When people make a decision like you have made, people who respect you to a certain degree
(family and room mate), will start to ponder certain Catholic Christian issues and values themselves.

When they said:

• Why is Aaron always happy and cheerful?
• Why is Aaron so kind to me?
• Why Is Aaron willing to do good deeds for me . . . even when I am mean or talk down to him?

we start to effect the way people view us and hopefully over time they will say:

I'd like to find out more about him, so I can become like him!

Like my non-practicing Catholic mother, Dorothy says:

Michael, Kill'em with kindness!

Her point, show that you have a higher level of maturity, and with time, it may lead them to have one too.

You said:

• Can I go to a Catholic Church for my studies?
• Would it be OK with the people there?

Sure!, I see no problem whatsoever with going to any Catholic Church for your studies. You may want to ask around or look for a priest known for his faithfulness to the Church or one who looks like he is living a prayerful life. Just tell him about your faith journey. You may have to make an appointment.

I would be shocked and surprised if the people there did not welcome you with open arms.

Final Note on addressing family and room mate issues: Remember an expression attributed (by some) to St. Francis on Evangelization:

Go and evangelize the world, and when necessary, use words.

Hope this helps a little,

Mike