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Anonymous Amy wrote: |
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Hi, guys —
A Catholic friend, especially of the family, who is not a practicing Catholic, is getting married outside the Church; it's an outdoor wedding. I know her family is not in agreement with it, but she has been living with her boyfriend outside of marriage and they are grateful that she is at least getting married.
I am a religious sister and close friend of all the family and have been invited to travel with the family to the wedding.
- Just as her family is not in agreement with her marriage outside the faith, neither am I, but in order to show my love for her and prayers that someday the marriage will be blessed in the Catholic faith, am I permitted to attend the wedding?
Sincere thanks for your advice.
Amy |
| { Is a family member or religious sister permitted to attend a marriage outside the Church? } |
Paul replied:
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Dear Amy,
Like any moral question, that has not been definitively defined by the Church, you will get various answers to this.
Personally, I can't see how someone who knows better can be present at the celebration of what amounts to perpetual fornication. The state sanctioning their relationship as marriage does not mean they are validly married. Some think it's better than no state sanction. I don't see the difference between an invalid marriage and a non-marriage.
Perhaps one of my colleagues will offer a differing opinion.
Paul
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Mike replied:
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Dear Amy,
My two cents:
I know of a friend who was in a similar situation.
She wanted to attend the wedding but was aware she would be called upon to be a witness to a "marriage" that was really not a marriage in the eyes of the Church, and she didn't want to seem like she was being a witness to a valid marriage.
She said she would have loved to go but had to work that day (or some other reason) but would pray for them anyway.
A small white lie – maybe, but better than being a witness to a marriage that really was not a marriage according to the Church.
I noted your Benedictine e-mail address. Me too, a Benedictine at heart!!
Mike
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